T is for THUMB

I think it's all because of the cushions blog. Revenge has obviously been on her mind ever since. Two whole days have now passed since the 'incident' and I'm still suffering the pain, never mind the unsightly look of hardened blood where skin should be. At first I didn't realise there was anything wrong, though a slight stinging feeling on the top of my left thumb was clearly advanced notice of a serious situation developing. The blood was secondary but altogether more immediate in its effect.

I knew I should have ignored her pleas to come and help in the kitchen. After all she had just obtained a new gadget on a shopping trip and, extremely alien to most females, hadn't paid a penny for it. No talk of 'this was cheap in the sales' or 'it was only half price' or 'I've seen one of these in Marks and Spencers at three times the price.' No, this was what men would call a real bargain - completely free! My curiosity was overwhelming. And after all, she had stood still in Debenhams for almost fifteen minutes, without uttering a word or opening a purse while an 'expert' salesman had demonstrated the gadget in action. I now realise that the previous sentence contains three minor miracles so the wait must have been worth the sacrifice! Anyway, to cut to the chase, this so called 'gadget' looked pretty simple and ever so flimsy but wife was keen to show that it did what it said on the packet or at least what the demonstrator was able to do. It reminded me of numerous visits to Balmoral Show or the Ideal Home Exhibition where all manner of 'demonstrators' produced devices that were going to revolutionise a woman's life in the kitchen, whether she was slicing vegetables, pulping fruit, cleaning worktops and hobs or just sharpening knives. Not surprisingly, they all worked perfectly in the hands of the master but get them home and the apprentice was left wondering if she didn't need a quick refresher course on the basics.

Still, I digress. Back to the gadget in question. It consisted of two parts, a central piece about three centimetres long that tapered to a point above which rotated what can only be described as a miniature helicopter blade. The idea, according to my wife, though you understand I am now receiving the information second hand, was to plunge the tapered piece fully into a potato and then rotate the miniature helicopter blade, thus producing delightful spirals of potato that could be deep fried to produce a new variation on a theme. I realised that the absence of a deep fat fryer in the house was clearly not a deterrent but the first few attempts by the new owner produced nothing that remotely resembled the picture in her memory from earlier in the day. Having destroyed a complete tuber, help was summoned and it was clear that a pheonix needed to rise from the ashes of the free gift. Admittedly the initial attempt produced little success but the male human brain has wonderful powers of doggedness and persistence and it was then that I realised the need for a degree of downward pressure on the miniature helicopter blade as it rotated. Sure enough, the spirals began to unravel before our eyes, just about the same time as a strange stinging sensation in my thumb confirmed that a potato doesn't bleed. One glance at the top of my thumb indicated that it wasn't there and it wasn't hiding, but it was difficult to see just what was missing through the mass of red liquid exuding and congealing all at the same time. First aid was sent for, which amounted to two sticking plasters, one to secure the other. Have you ever tried to put a sticking plaster over the top of your thumb. It just wasn't made for that. Anyway, the spirals were admired for a few seconds, the gadget deemed a success and the whole potato mess consigned to the bin, a job well done and look at the money we saved! To be honest, the mark on the top of my thumb measures about two millimetres in diameter, bled for about twenty seconds, caused slight discomfort, but enough for any man to moan about for at least a good two weeks. What I have learned, however, is just how important my thumb is even though it is such a small part of the body and how many simple tasks are made more difficult by not having it in proper working order. Try turning a page, putting on a tie, fastening a belt, lifting a peanut (though this is not one of life's necessities, I grant you), tying shoelaces and I still haven't made it out of the bedroom!

It reminded me once again that every believer who is part of the body of Christ is important to Him and, regardless of how unimportant or menial we think our role might be, we have been put in that position for a purpose and that purpose might just involve somebody coming to a saving faith. Paul writes in his letter to the church in Rome, 'Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.' And because we belong to each other and to our Father, if one part fails to function, the whole body can be affected. I might only be a thumb but I still have a unique print to leave.